The Fate of Death…
We are all going to die-well at least physically our bodies will deteriorate to a substance similar to dirt. Even if you believe in the process of reincarnation, your body will be destroyed again-in whatever form that you return. Death is still seen as a taboo in the American culture. We hide it behind plastic surgery, Botox injection, live longer and live stronger ads, but it does not change anything…Your heart will one day stop beating, your limbs will one day crumble, your throat will refuse to swallow.
We are all going to die-well at least physically our bodies will deteriorate to a substance similar to dirt. Even if you believe in the process of reincarnation, your body will be destroyed again-in whatever form that you return. Death is still seen as a taboo in the American culture. We hide it behind plastic surgery, Botox injection, live longer and live stronger ads, but it does not change anything…Your heart will one day stop beating, your limbs will one day crumble, your throat will refuse to swallow.
Elderly Views…
As we look at our elderly, we show pity. Sometimes we show fear by ignoring the inevitable that is going to happen to us. Living in an individualistic society does not tell us to take care of granny or grandpa, but send them away to a luxurious home so you can live a stress free life. Do you want someone to throw you in a home with complete strangers and the lack of love and familial affection?
Thought Process…
Respect your elders…That includes loving and taking care of them too, however we have forgotten that part. I have forgotten that part too. I believe one of the rites of passage of adulthood is taking responsibility for the ones who took care of you when you were younger. Before my mom passed away, I was trying to “work” on myself-create a career that would be financially secure enough to take care of her and other family members. What happened if I missed the point, could it have been simply me taking more time to just be with her in my busy, but not so busy schedule? What-ifs comes through my mind, I can only move forward and try to be more caring to my grandmother in my available state.
Grandmother Duties Explored…
Do I want to stay at home when I would rather be out the house, change sheets continuously because of her inability to go to the restroom, deal with mood swings due to a variety of Cancer pill cocktails, watch a strong person, physically become weak? No… No…No… But did my mother want to have an 8 hour labor with me? Did my grandmother want to give me her last dime, in my time of trouble? Did my dad want to give me his brand new truck? I am sure in all these situations there were some hesitations from my elders, but they did it because they loved me…unconditionally. I believe the youth today is missing that unconditional love for their elders. We parade around as if we have the time machine hidden in our closets…However, we better remember the people who took care of us, if we want someone to take care of us in the future…Reciprocity…
Final Word…
As I learn my new position as one of the caregivers for my grandmother, I have to take the responsibility with pride-though it will take some time with Brother Complain following me. Yet deep down I know to help my grandmother who is 75 years old is only a gift from the creator, and that is how I should look at it.
Below are some statistics about black elderly:
As we look at our elderly, we show pity. Sometimes we show fear by ignoring the inevitable that is going to happen to us. Living in an individualistic society does not tell us to take care of granny or grandpa, but send them away to a luxurious home so you can live a stress free life. Do you want someone to throw you in a home with complete strangers and the lack of love and familial affection?
Thought Process…
Respect your elders…That includes loving and taking care of them too, however we have forgotten that part. I have forgotten that part too. I believe one of the rites of passage of adulthood is taking responsibility for the ones who took care of you when you were younger. Before my mom passed away, I was trying to “work” on myself-create a career that would be financially secure enough to take care of her and other family members. What happened if I missed the point, could it have been simply me taking more time to just be with her in my busy, but not so busy schedule? What-ifs comes through my mind, I can only move forward and try to be more caring to my grandmother in my available state.
Grandmother Duties Explored…
Do I want to stay at home when I would rather be out the house, change sheets continuously because of her inability to go to the restroom, deal with mood swings due to a variety of Cancer pill cocktails, watch a strong person, physically become weak? No… No…No… But did my mother want to have an 8 hour labor with me? Did my grandmother want to give me her last dime, in my time of trouble? Did my dad want to give me his brand new truck? I am sure in all these situations there were some hesitations from my elders, but they did it because they loved me…unconditionally. I believe the youth today is missing that unconditional love for their elders. We parade around as if we have the time machine hidden in our closets…However, we better remember the people who took care of us, if we want someone to take care of us in the future…Reciprocity…
Final Word…
As I learn my new position as one of the caregivers for my grandmother, I have to take the responsibility with pride-though it will take some time with Brother Complain following me. Yet deep down I know to help my grandmother who is 75 years old is only a gift from the creator, and that is how I should look at it.
Below are some statistics about black elderly:
- Cancer is found to be a critical problem for black elderly Americans.
- For black elderly, in particular, family is of primary importance to provide them with quality and substantial care.
- The African American or Black population is living longer.
- The Black or African American older population was 3.1 million in 2007 and is projected to grow to over 9.9 million by 2050. In 2007, African American people made up 8.3 percent of the older population. By 2050, the percentage of the older population that is African American is projected to account for 11 percent of the older population.
- In 2007, 57% of older Black men lived with their spouses, 10% lived with other relatives, 4 percent lived with non-relatives, and 29 percent lived alone. For older Black women, 25% lived with their spouses, 32 percent lived with other relatives, 2 percent lived with non-relatives, and 40 percent lived alone.
- The poverty rate in 2007 for Black elderly (65 and older) was 23% which was more than twice the rate of all elderly…
- Help the elder identify and understand the impact of mental and physical health issues, and be able to distinguish these from social and economic issues — as well as how to tap appropriate resources.
- Help the elder explore what he or she wishes to change and acceptable methods for change.
- Be realistic about your limitations and those of your family members.
- Know the best person to call when you feel the need to talk, cry, or just hang out.
- Actively manage your health. This is a good time to be honest with yourself about your habits. It is during times of stress that inadequate health regimes become most apparent. You can’t help your loved one if you aren’t well.
- Call family members together to discuss what is needed and how to allocate resources.
- Use positive communication tools to create a plan with your network of family, friends, and other supporters.
- If possible, agree on a plan of action and divide responsibilities. ©NEEMA
- For more information on black elderly and being a care giver please visit the following websites:
- http://www.aoa.gov/AoARoot/Aging_Statistics/minority_aging/Facts-on-Black-Elderly2009-plain_format.aspxthe rate for all elderly (9.7%).
- http://cas.umkc.edu/casww/blackeld.htm
- http://www.hom.org/?page_id=1246
- http://www.academia.edu/1054724/Empowering_African_American_Women_Informal_Caregivers_A_Literature_Synthesis_and_Practice_Strategies
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